I half to start out by saying that this has been a tough week, and if I'm really truthful a tough month for me as well. I find myself boiling in secrecy and hiding behind this screen I'm writing on now the feeling and thoughts in my heart. I don't know how else to say that I feel less of a man now than ever before, my desires and dreams, the ruggedness of my heart has all seemed to have been polished down to stones. Stones that if thrown in water would never ripple. I have been reading this book Wild at Heart and it is the picture perfect image of the man I wish I was and want to be. So much of me wonders what happened to the last 6 yrs of my life and why am I here wondering what to do know. Normally one would feel good graduating school, having God do great things while I was in the military but I feel forgotten now. I know I'm not but I feel like I've been put on the shelf. I would often hide these emotions and feeling s from the world but transparency is the best. God, am I a Joseph right now, or maybe a JOB. I wish I knew, because the Stallion in me that once ran free has now found the fenced in yard that no longer gives freedom and life. I now God is doing something but what I don't know. It is a battle I cannot understand and right now am finding it hard to fight!
I thought I would throw this in for a little humor. Notice the Security sign?
2 comments:
Draw Barton...use your talent.
healthy body makes you feel better
love you dude
Post a Comment